"Snail's Pace Productions Pleasant Facade Estates The Bizzy Buddies
The Night Before Christmas humorous illustrated story featuring The Bizzy Buddies writer illustrator Vuja Day
SCENE 1
INT. HOUSE - AFTERNOON
Bud imparts wisdom unto Barley:
"You can always leave something unsaid, but you can never unsay something. There is no rewind button.
We are pure love at our core
we are pure energy in our body and spiritual self
this energy has a consciousness, it is love and wisdom (spirtually awakened and evolved)
this wisdom is accessible to anyone on earth, you don't have to be deeply spiritual to tap into it
tapping into the consciousness, our spiritual self is always connected to the energy
energy never dies, it just changes form
We all have a purpose - theres a reason for everything
nothing to fear about death
spiritual beings having a human experience
we don't die, we just go to a different location in a different form
there is a reason for bad things to happen
Death is not the end of you - its start of new experience
being human is phenomenal, weve been given the gift of human emotions
in this flow of oneness, we are all god in our essence
god is energy, every time you breathe, you take in the
The kitchen is an utter mess
LEAZA:
xxxxx
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JOEY RAINBOW:
(shuddering)
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Barley's Theory:\par
Jesus and the loaves.... the "loaves" were really bugs, which attracted the fish.\par
\par
When Tommy and Amy got married, they were officiated by a shaman/ an ayuyasca shaman.
They lived in a tent on the Tuckus Farm
God Almighty and The Devil Himself have a friendly wager going... If humans are really as stupid as The Devil Himself claims them to be.
GOD:
Okay, what are the terms? Over what time period?
DEVIL:
Oh, I don't know, how 'bout the next million years
GOD:
Okay you're ON!
People don't know they're hot if they've never experienced cold. They don't know thirst if they've never been thirsty.
Barley wants to get a job in the crystal shop for the summer. H is dad wants him to work for his extermination biz.
The spirits show Barley that we start as "worms in the bowels of the earth" (eek! shudder!) Each lifetime we have (they are like dreams we don't remember) we are supposed to learn something... but we don't know what it is and we're not supposed to know what it is. We're supposed to discover it.
There's our "Big Self" (the id, soul) and our "Earth Self" (the ego, earth)
The Devil wants God to lose the bet, so he sends a whole bunch of dumbshit AI types to infiltrate the race
Hell is having to go back to the beginning... as a worm or a fly.
Barley in drivers ed class:
Teacher: "... so remember class, driving is serious business. You are responsible for 5,000 pounds of steel and what that steel could do under your care/negligence. If a deer runs in front of you on the road, don't swerve. Run it over".
girls in the class gasp "Ughhhhh!!!"
Teacher: (unfazed) "I'm dead serious here folks, if it's a deer, if it's a squirrel, if it's the neighbor's dog... if they run in front of you, run 'em over. Don't swerve and kill yourself smashed up into a tree."
Barley was rattled by that class. Then his dad needs to go to the store (with a cast on his leg) Barley has his learner's permit. He is still rattled by the drivers ed class, and his dad's nagging, when he suddenly sees a snail crossing the road. Barley JAMS on his brakes, the car spins and flips over and slams into a tree, which saved their lives (the Grandpa Tree)
Barley accidentally crashes the family car when he swerves to avoid a SNAIL in the road.
Barley realizes that the old apple tree saved his life. He goes over to the side of the road, climbs over the fence and hugs the tree. The Grandpa's face materializes there. But Barley doesn't see it. (Barley has not yet met Bud the Alien or Selantra. He is still depressed and going through his sleeping alot phase (Rip Van Barley)
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LITTER SEES ORBS:
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Littler says she sees orbs. Barley encourages her to describe it and to instill wonder.\par
Littler tells her parents about the orbs.\par
TOMMY: It's just mucous in your eye.\par
LITTLER: I really saw them, they were dancing around.\par
TAMMY: (annoyed) Okay honey, go to bed.\par
Littler makes a mess, sprinkling glitter around the house "I'm playing fairy"
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BARLEY/SELANTRA CONVERSATIONS
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Barley: be careful what words you put out there... because once they're said, there's no un-saying them. Once someone hears them/those words, they take on a different dynamic.\par
Selentra: Wow!\par
Jake: What'd he just say?\par
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I f a tree falls in the woods and no one's around, did it make a sound?\par
Selentra: Oh wow!\par
Jake: What the heck is he talking about?\par
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Barley and Selentra kiss... and they recoil from each other, and a thought balloon goes over each of their heads: "That's just like kissing my brother..." "That's just like kissing my sister..."\par
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Then things get awkward between Selentra and Barley. For a while they stop seeing each other, or seeing the friends of friends of the other.\par
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Barley talking about reincarnation: \par
BARLEY: Just because you didn't remember your dream \strike didn't\strike0 /doesn't mean you didn't dream.\par
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The mind doesn't know the difference between imagination and reality\par
CROP CIRCLE:
A crop circle appears in the field... both Barley and his Uncle Troy view it independently. Neither one of them takes a picture. the crop circle dissolves away after one minute. View of Barley in his window, and Troy in the field, each one with a thought balloon "Am I going crazy?!"
Barley tells his family about it, they don't take it seriously. Troy is telling his family and they aren't taking it seriously.
+++++++++++++++++
BARLEY:
Barley is lying in his bed thinking about his mom, who died when he was 2 or 3. He suddenly starts singing Puff the Magic Dragon. His mother used to sing that to him, but he doesn't remember her that well/does remember...
Barley loves Puff the Magic Dragon. He cries every time he hears it. His mother used to sing it to him. His mother was Amy, Tommy's hippie first wife. Tommy, Amy and Barley had lived in a tent on the property. When Barley was 3(?) years old she died by accident somehow. After that, Tommy left town, leaving his 3 year-old son in the care of his brother Troy and sister-in-law Jane.
Barley lived with his Uncle Troy and Aunt Jane for a number of years. Also living in the house was Jake, Barley's jealous cousin.
"Two lost souls adrift on the same sea"
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Cilantra's family moves to Pleasant Facade Estates. Her father is Roland Gordon and her mother maintains a separate residence in The City. Roland Gordon moves to Pleasant Facade Estates. He is a Banker and he brokered the Pleasant Facade Estate deal (and made alot of money). Cilantra is 17 years old (older than Barley)\par
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Barley: Bankers? Eww. I don't even have a bank account.\par
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where do you keep your money?\par
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Barley bends over to his shoe... "here, in my shoe"\par
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Barley and Cilantra talking... "Boy, and I thought MY family was nuts" they have alot in common\par
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their cousin Jake (the snake) cheats via text on his tests.... he has someone google everything and text back a message.n \par
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Jake is getting away with it... for awhile. And then he gets caught. (he gets cocky and smug)No, this doesn't mean you can be humble and a thief at the same time.\par
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000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000\par
\pard\nowidctlpar\li360\qj The universe to the aliens:\par
\pard\nowidctlpar\sa200\sl276\slmult1 "they are always being given the chances ... the question is, are they taking them?"\par
\pard\nowidctlpar\li360\qj The aliens to Barley:\par
\pard\nowidctlpar\sa200\sl276\slmult1 "you are always being given the chances ... the question is, are you taking them?"\par
\pard\nowidctlpar\li360\qj\par
Barley to his friends:\par
\pard\nowidctlpar\sa200\sl276\slmult1 "we are always being given the chances ... the question is, are we taking them?"\par
\pard\nowidctlpar\li360\qj\par
"I am always being given the chance... the question is, am I taking them?"\par
\par
The universe to the aliens:\par
bbbbbbbbbbbbbb"They are spirits having a "human experience". \par
"What does that mean?" \par
"\strike That's up to them to find out\strike0 ."\line\par
\par
The aliens talking to Barley:\par
"You are spirits having a "human experience". \par
"What does that mean?" \par
"\strike That's up to you to find out."\line\strike0\par
\par
Barley to his friends:\par
"We are spirits having a "human experience". \par
"What does that mean?" \par
"That's up to you to find out."\par
\pard\nowidctlpar\par
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Barley and the Orbs: each one emanates its own color, all the emotions, the more color you have to draw from, the more balanced you are.\par
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Barley barely averts catastrophe... he stops to examine the bottom of his shoe (or he steps in dogshit) and a car goes speeding by, it would've hit him had he been a second sooner.\par
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Orbs: you want to be around other people who radiate\par
The Orbs will guide you through life, open your 3rd eye to see, your soul, you will be given the 5th dimension. within that you see these orbs.\par
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LITTLER: I'm enamaled with you...\par
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the orbs look like fuzzy rainbow bubbles.\par
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He sees the bubble, and it averts catastrophe, the bubble stops the door from slamming on him.\par
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When Barley was little, his mother told him about the energy orbs... the more you see them, the more effortless life is\par
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Baarley steps in dog shit, stops, freaks out, all of a sudden a speeding car comes by, the very place he would've been standing if he hadn't stepped in the dog shit.\par
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Barley's car accident:\par
Barley is taking driver's training classes, his teacher Mr. Hearn (who looks like Jack Webb) exhorts the class, if faced with an animal running across the road, to NOT swerve (and thus kill yourself) but instead, "Run it over!". The class is horriified, some of the girls (and boys) start crying! Later, Tommy lets Barley drive, but Barley swerves when he sees a SNAIL in the road! He loses control, and they nearly crash down the hill, but the Grandpa Tree saves them. (But Tommy has TWO broken legs!) Later on, Barley goes outside and hugs the Grandpa Tree. \par
\par
Soon after that, CROP CIRCLES appear in the Tuckus family farm field! Everyone thinks it's a hoax (except for Timmy and Barley)... especially when Barley starts seeing "Bud" the Alien! No one else can see the alien, except for the new girl, Selantra, who moves in (her dad is the broker for PFE) and she moves in with him (and out of her mother's penthouse apartment in the city).\par
\par
SELANTRA: Is that a little green monster on your shoulder?\par
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BUD: (thinking... indignantly) "Little green monster"?!\par
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Selantra and Barley become good friends when they discover their mutual love of crystals and nature. Barley's cousin Jake has a MAJOR crush on Barley's step-sister (Tammy's daughter) Leeza. Leeza is a year older than them, the obnoxious queen bee of the "popular group". Jake accidentally locks his bicycle to hers at school, prompting her to miss an important appointment\par
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Little white butterflies appear when Barley thinks of his mom. Barley believes in the Grandpa Tree. (It's the same grandpa who built the wall and planted the tree.) He panted the tree 100 years ago, and he has come back from the spirit world inhabiting that tree.\par
\par
CROP CIRCLE:
A crop circle appears in the field... both Barley and his Uncle Troy view it independently. Neither one of them takes a picture. the crop circle dissolves away after one minute. View of Barley in his window, and Troy in the field, each one with a thought balloon "Am I going crazy?!"
Barley tells his family about it, they don't take it seriously. Troy is telling his family and they aren't taking it seriously.
+++++++++++++++++
BARLEY:
Barley is lying in his bed thinking about his mom, who died when he was 2 or 3. He suddenly starts singing Puff the Magic Dragon. His mother used to sing that to him, but he doesn't remember her that well/does remember...
Barley loves Puff the Magic Dragon. He cries every time he hears it. His mother used to sing it to him. His mother was Amy, Tommy's hippie first wife. Tommy, Amy and Barley had lived in a tent on the property. When Barley was 3(?) years old she died by accident somehow. After that, Tommy left town, leaving his 3 year-old son in the care of his brother Troy and sister-in-law Jane.
Barley lived with his Uncle Troy and Aunt Jane for a number of years. Also living in the house was Jake, Barley's jealous cousin.
"Two lost souls adrift on the same sea"
++++++++++++++++++
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INTERIOR: HOUSE\par
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Barley has just arrived home after school. LEAZA walks up.\par
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LEAZA:\par
Your dad is looking for you,\par
( gleefully)\par
and boy is he mad!\par
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TOMMY:\par
(off stage)\par
BARLEY!!!!!\par
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TIMMY:\par
Dad\rquote s in the garage.\par
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INTERIOR GARAGE\par
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Tommy is standing near the trashcan. Tammy is nearby, freaking out.\par
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TOMMY:\par
Barley, why didn\rquote t you take the trash cans out to the curb?!\par
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BARLEY:\par
It would upset my experiment. \par
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There are maggots all over the trash can\par
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BARLEY:\par
Maggotts? The maggots hatched! Timmy, the maggots hatched!\par
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TOMMY:\par
You have him involved in this?! What about Littler?\par
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BARLEY:\par
I was teaching them the life cycle of the fly.\par
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TOMMY:\par
You\rquote re not teaching them THAT stuff! about reproduction. Flies spread disease!\par
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What kind of dead body do you have out there?!\par
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Just some rotting tomatoes and lettuce... \par
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LITTLER:\par
...and dog poop!\par
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WHAT?!?!?!?\par
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LITTLER:\par
And Uncle Troy let us have as much horse poop as we wanted from his stalls!\par
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TIMMY:\par
Yeah, he even brought MORE poop over with his bulldozer!\par
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TOMMY:\par
(eyes bugging)\par
WHAAATTTT?!\par
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Then Tommy spies a melted candybar on the ground, with swarms of ants covering it.\par
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TOMMY:\par
What's THIS?!?!!?\par
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BARLEY:\par
(gulping)\par
My other experiment.\par
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TOMMY:\par
"Other experiment"?! \strike You mean \strike0 there's OTHERS?!\par
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BARLEY:\par
Well, yeah, a coupla. I was trying to teach Timmy and Littler about insects and stuff.\par
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TOMMY:\par
Get rid of these maggotts!\par
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BARLEY:\par
Get RID of?\par
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TOMMY:\par
Kill them all! Hey, that would make a good slogan. Kill them all. I need to update my website and business cards.\par
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BARLEY:\par
Kill? As in DEAD?\par
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Suddlenly Littler starts crying, and then Timmy and Barley. They are all wailing. A though balloon appears\par
"I must be missing something here.\par
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TOMMY:\par
They're too young to know about reproduction/that stuff!! You're not their parent... you're only their half-brother!\par
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Barley is taken aback by this comment, and then his dad realizes suddenly how insensitive it sounded.\par
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TOMMY:\par
(stammering)\par
Tommy, that came out wrong, what I mean isn't that you're "only" their half brother, what I mean is that you're not the parent, you shouldn't be teaching them about things they can't handle, like reproduction. You mistook what I said, of course you're their brother, it doesn't matter what percent is blood.\par
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Barley walks sadly away. \par
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Barley misses his mom who died when he was 3 years old. She used to collect bugs with him. Butterflies appear whenever he thinks about his mom.\par
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Barley in bed, tear drops from his eye "I miss my REAL mom".\par
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